Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
