so that wasnt chicken after all
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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