I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
