I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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