Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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