at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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