i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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