Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
