If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Rumble strips road head = magical
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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