As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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