Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
