you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
