Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
wow bdsm is so cute
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
