no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
