The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize