Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Randomize
