i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
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