By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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