I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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