i need an iv and a liver transplant
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
