How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
