She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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