Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize