Banned from zoo.
Again?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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