At least make sure they are 18
Why
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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