But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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