Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
so much tequila, so little girl.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
