Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
what is it with giant penises always finding me
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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