My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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