I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
