I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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