do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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