are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Randomize
