i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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