how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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