So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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