I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
