You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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