he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
