tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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