filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
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