Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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