You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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