So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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