I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
