so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
