I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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