Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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