yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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