She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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