So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
