did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
